**Chills***

Ok, so I am admittedly a big Glee fan.  But I got chills when I heard this song for the first time tonight.  It's beautiful, and puts so much of what I feel so much of the time into words.

Giving Thanks

A very good friend reminded me yesterday of the value found in learning to live for my blessings.  I think sometimes I spend far too much time wallowing in my trials and focusing on the bad things that come my way.  I have so much good in my life though and don't take enough time to truly be grateful for all the many wonderful things in my life.  So I thought such a good way to focus on my blessings would be to give thanks for them all.

**my amazing family**

**my awesome friends, who are always there for me**

**my health**

**a job I really enjoy**

**working for a company that is based on integrity**

**working with people I enjoy and respect**

**being able to learn from my mistakes**

**being able to choose the path my life takes**

**a working brain**

**no physical ailments**

**the gift of agency**

**a foundation of beliefs and faith**

**the knowledge of a loving Heavenly Father**

**my wonderful dogs who always seem to know what my mood is**

**the ability to work my feelings out through piano**

**music**

**the ability to find humor in life***

**laughter** 

 **ice cream**

Holy Deliciousness!!!!!

Thank you Char for the recipe for this delicious soup!!!!

1 lb chicken breasts (3-4 fillets)
1 can cream of chicken soup
1/2 C diced onion
1 garlic clove
4 C chicken broth
1 C masa harina (flour)
3 C water
1 can enchilada sauce
16 oz. Velveeta Cheese
1 tsp salt, to taste
1 tsp chili powder
1/2 tsp cumin

Add chicken breasts and one can of cream of chicken soup to a crock pot and bake for about 4-5 hours on high.
When the chicken is done baking...
Add onions and garlic to a pot and saute over medium heat for about 2 minutes, or until the onions begin to become translucent.
Add chicken broth to the pot.
Combine masa harina with 2 cups of water in a medium bowl and whisk until blended.
Add the masa mixture to the pot with the onions, garlic and broth.
Add remaining water, enchilada sauce, cheese and spices and bring mixture to a boil.
Shred the chicken into small, bite-size pieces and add it to the pot.
Reduce heat and simmer soup for 30-40 minutes or until thick.
Serve in cups or bowls and garnish with shredded cheese and crumpled tortilla chips.

(I made my own tortilla chips for this soup. Slice up several flour tortillas into thin strips and saute with a 1 tsp of olive oil and a pinch of salt until the tortillas strips are crispy).

Ahhhh.....renewal

I've been battling a case of the blues and douldrums big time.  And to the amazing people in my life who have been trying to pull me out of it, I love you so much!  I found an unexpected way out of those blues today!  I went into ShopKo innocently today and found a half price sale.  I was far too weak to resist.  But when I spent the rest of the day smiling every time I looked at my super cute new purse, I knew that this little peek of spring was exactly what I needed!  And who can argue with $15?

I want

right about now, I so want to be here.  Tucked away on a tropical beach somewhere, under a palm tree, sipping drinks with umbrellas in them.  I think right about now, I would even want it to be a solitary hammock.  I'm just feeling out of sync and want to take a break from my life.  And I'm just sick and tired of being tired all the time, which I have been lately.  ***sigh****

Best skiing in the world!

   ....story of my life!!!  I was in Jackson, where they have some of THE best skiing in the world, and I'm working!  I have GOT to spend more time in some of these fabulous places playing, not working!  I so wanted to be skiing down those slopes and not working....not that my stupid ankle would have let me.....good thing I get snowmobiling instead! 

  

What an amazing weekend!

Last weekend was so completely and totally what I needed.  For the first time in a long time, I was able to check out of life and every single stress I have.  Two days at the cabin in Island Park, with 6 amazing friends, obscene amounts of delicious treats, movies, magazines, games, and so much talking.  It was exactly what the doctor ordered.  Angie, Mica, Sara, Dessa, Steph, and Kara, I love you ladies so much!  Thank you for being great friends and thank you for a wonderful weekend!!!  And remember....what happens at the cabin stays at the cabin ladies!

The cabin and look at all that snow!  It was gorgeous!!





In Need....

I am sorely in need of a break!  Life has dumped a lot on my shoulders lately and the pressure is starting to get to me.  I know I've gotten cranky and difficult.  I need to get away from everyday life and take a break from everything on my shoulders.

And thankfully, that break is coming this weekend!!!!  I will be joining some very good friends and amazing women for a weekend away in Island Park!  

Ahhhh......a weekend of music, games, movies, sleeping in, napping, good food, even better company, and no stress....hello HEAVEN....you are only 2 days away!
  

Life is nothing if not interesting.  No matter how well you plan, or what you want for your life, sometimes things happen and life has it's own plans.  I've been faced with some things lately that, while they've come about because of my own decisions, they are far from what I ever planned to have happen.  Sometimes you just go along, thinking you're doing the best you can, and you don't realize until it's too late that your best isn't good enough.  It's a hard realization.  Because of that, I've had a lot of moments of questioning myself...my worth, my abilities, my value.  I tend to internalize things a lot and not express what I'm feeling.  I have some wonderful friends, but I don't tend to unload my problems on them.  So this is something I've been dealing with alone.  Finally this week, I opened up to two very special people, who both mean very much to me for different reasons.  Neither of them were able to solve my problem....and in fact, I am not sure that there is a solution for my problem.  But I wanted to thank these two dear, wonderful friends.  You were there for me when I needed you.  You gave me your ear, your shoulder, and your kind, caring, and non judgemental compassion.  You helped me to believe in myself a little bit again, and I love you both very much.

In the process of the last few months, in addition to the bad choices I've made, I've hurt someone who had become incredibly important to me.  The last thing I ever wanted to do was hurt Matthew, but I did.  And I've learned that "I'm sorry" doesn't always make things better.  Sometimes when you hurt someone you care for, you don't always get a second chance.  And you don't realize the worth of what you had until you've lost it.  I know it doesn't make things better, or change what happened, but I'm so, so sorry Matthew.  You are an amazing person and I will alway regret damaging our relationship.

I'm a very musical person.  I listen to music when I'm happy, when I'm sad, when I'm depressed, when I'm working, when I'm working out, when I'm driving....pretty much always.  I've found a few songs that have literally got me through the last few weeks.

I heard this song for the very first time one day when I was having a very, very hard day.  I was feeling very low.   

 

I got this song from my friend Stacey.  I just love it.   

 

This song is an old friend and favorite.  I cried the first time I ever heard this song.  Since that night, it's been my go to song when I'm down.  When Josh hears it playing on my iPod or laptop, he immediately comes to me and gives me a hug, and says, Just so you know, I love you.  I think that means I'm predictable!  

I just read something from someone called the FlyLady, who teaches women how to take control of their homes and lives.  She teach people to learn to FLY....Finally Love Yourself.  That's what I'm working on.  I'm working on learning to forgive myself for my shortcomings and learning to realize that it's OK--that even when I fail, or let down the people who depend on me, I'm still OK.  And with the amazing friends I'm blessed with, I must be doing something right!  

I stole this from my sister in law, because I loved it so much.

HANDBOOK 2011

Health:

1. Drink plenty of water.

2. Eat breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince and dinner like a beggar.

3. Eat more foods that grow on trees and plants and eat less food that is manufactured in plants..

4. Live with the 3 E's -- Energy, Enthusiasm and Empathy

5. Make time to pray.

6. Play more games

7. Read more books than you did in 2010 .

8. Sit in silence for at least 10 minutes each day

9. Sleep for 7 hours.

10. Take a 10-30 minutes walk daily. And while you walk, smile.



Personality:

11. Don't compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.

12. Don't have negative thoughts or things you cannot control. Instead invest your energy in the positive present moment.

13. Don't over do. Keep your limits.

14. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.

15. Don't waste your precious energy on gossip.

16. Dream more while you are awake

17. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need..

18. Forget issues of the past.. Don't remind your partner with His/her mistakes of the past. That will ruin your present happiness.

19. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone. Don't hate others.

20. Make peace with your past so it won't spoil the present.

21. No one is in charge of your happiness except you.

22. Realize that life is a school and you are here to learn. Problems are simply part of the curriculum that appear and fade away like algebra class but the lessons you learn will last a lifetime.

23. Smile and laugh more.

24. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree...



Society:

25. Call your family often.

26. Each day give something good to others.

27. Forgive everyone for everything.

28. Spend time w/ people over the age of 70 & under the age of 6.

29. Try to make at least three people smile each day.

30. What other people think of you is none of your business.

31. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends will. Stay in touch.



Life:

32. Do the right thing!

33. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.

34. GOD heals everything.

35. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.

36. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.

37. The best is yet to come.

38. When you awake alive in the morning, thank GOD for it.

39. Your Inner most is always happy. So, be happy.